It’s the same every night.  As soon as I put Christopher down to bed the shouting starts.  Chris is only a couple of months old and I’m so tired.  It wasn’t an easy birth and I’m still uncomfortable, but Nick wants us to have sex because he says it’s his right as my fiancé.  If I don’t he will go back to his old girlfriend, I know he will, he’s told me. 

I have to stay in with Christopher because I’m breastfeeding him and I haven’t got any friends or family nearby to help with babysitting.  John said we should have a brand new start as a family so we moved to a little village in the middle of nowhere.  The house where we live is really basic.  It was all we could afford.  We are going to renovate it together.  

The village is a lovely place to live, it’s really pretty and quiet, but I feel like such an outsider.  Everyone from the village knows each other.   It’s really intimidating moving to somewhere new and being so young with a young family.

Last night Nick decided he’d waited long enough.  He came upstairs as soon as he heard on the baby monitor that Christopher was quiet and told me to go into the bedroom.  I was in so much pain but he didn’t care.  I need to speak to someone about what happened but there’s no phone signal at our house and there’s only two buses a day into the next town.  What am I going to do?

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